Encounter #85.1: The Carpenter

App: Bumble

Name: James*

Date Location: Coop’s – Quincy, MA

Location Review: 3.5 Stars – It’s a dive. You’ll be partying next to some 50-something named Richard but the drinks are decent.

Date Duration: 5 hours

What Happened:

In a moment of loneliness, I fell victim to purchasing Bumble Premium yet again. James was one of the few winners during this time.

To be honest, I didn’t take a good look at his profile before meeting up. He met my “requirements” and at that point in time, that was enough. We had a good back and forth going on the app which translated to text so when he asked if I wanted to go out, I immediately said yes.

He offered a dive bar and something a bit classier but since I am trash, picked the dive route. He beat me there and the bar was full so I had no idea who I was really looking for. I called him, a man turned around, and that was not what I signed up for. Fuck it. Already there. Could stay for a drink.

When I got home I looked at his profile and saw what happened. Most of his pics had this other guy in them so I just assumed the other guy was who I was meeting up with and I just didn’t look close enough.

Despite not being the most attractive, James delivered. We just had a solid banter and he took the time to ask questions. He had grown up in the area and then got into construction so he ended up going down to Florida to flip houses for a while. Eventually, he made his way back up to MA and did tiling and caulking jobs. He lived maybe 10/15 minutes from me and did not vote republican. Really, couldn’t ask for more.

I just liked talking to him and there was an interesting sexual tension between us that I wanted to explore. I can’t explain it but we had an energy there that I hadn’t had in a while. I don’t know if it was because we were polar opposites or if it was from all the Coronas we chugged but, it just felt like we were equally interested in the other and he had this air about him that drew me in.

We drank quite a bit and he covered everything. We shut the bar down so he walked me to my car around the corner (I can’t parallel park). I was cold so he put his arm around me which felt so good. It’s small, but those are the things that make me feel important.

As expected, when we got to the car we had a *tasteful make-out. Nothing too crazy but definitely left us both wanting more. So when he asked if we could go out again a few days later, I couldn’t say no.

Encounter #52.1: Tennis Guy

App: The League

Name: Gareth*

Date Location: Lucky 7 Tavern – Jersey City

Location Review:  4.0 Stars – Definitely a dive bar but has a really cool feel. Lots of band posters and stickers all along the walls and a solid ass happy hour menu.

Date Duration: 3 hours

What Happened:

I had downloaded The League (AKA the most pretentious ass dating app in all the land) around the time of the break up. It’s tough to match and no one ever sends messages so I was surprised that Gareth even started a conversation.

He seemed like a fun guy. Conversation was easy over text and as it turned out he lived in the building attached to the one I nanny in. All about convenient fuckery. He worked in finance but definitely wasn’t one those those douchey bros in the Patagonia vests.

I agreed to a date and we checked out a dive bar that neither one of us had gone to before. He was waiting for me outside and I was a bit disappointed. He was cute but was more petite than expected. Another one that I could have benched. Fuck it, I was already there. May as well see what happens.

Conversation with him was as easy in person as it was over text. He not only gave decent answers but he also asked decent questions. WHAT A CONCEPT. He had an interesting background. He went abroad for his graduate degree and while he was there played professional tennis for a bit. Casual. He also offered to split an app so I was a happy clam. Imma get dirty on some popcorn chicken.

We had been drinking for a few hours and it was time for me to go home. Gareth walked me to the train and we made loose plans to see each other again. We kissed, nothing too crazy and texted a bit over the days following but nothing ever came from it. To be honest, I was fine with it. I had a great time but, physically speaking it just wasn’t there for me and I was afraid I would have led him on. Back to the drawing board.

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