Encounter #60.1: Coffee

App: Hinge

Name: Liam*

Date Location: The Roost Outpost – Hoboken, NJ

Location Review:  3.0 Stars – Given that I was only in there for 2 minutes because #Corona I can’t give it a fair review. It looked cute and the coffee was fine.

Date Duration: 4 hours

What Happened:

Liam and I met up right before shit got real in NJ thanks to Coronavirus. At this point in time, parks were open and you could still see other people as long as you were 6 feet apart.

Over Hinge, Liam seemed cool. He was quick and decently funny. In person, not as much. We got our coffees and pretty quickly it was clear we weren’t going to be a match. There were uncomfortably long silences between sentences.

Liam has some slight interesting points to him. He originally went to school to be a doctor but ultimately changed paths and did computer science. He lived right on Washington Street in Hoboken so he was in the thick of the scene and considering how much he paid in rent, the place had to have been nice. Truthfully those were the most interesting things we covered.

We walked along the river in Hoboken and over to one of the dog parks. Truthfully I think we were out as long as we were because we were both bored and had started our self-quarantines.

He walked me to the train and we never spoke again.

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Encounter #22.1: Beanie Boy

App: Tinder

Name: Beck*

Date Location: 9 Bar Cafe

Location Review: 2.5 Stars – Small space, not a lot of coffee options, hipster AF

Date Duration: 1.5 hours

What Happened:

It had been a few weeks since I had gone out with anyone. After cutting someone loose because of herpes, I felt it was time to be a little more passive with the dating game. Rather than swipe aggressively, craft answers, and make myself available I would just see what came into my inbox and go from there.

Beck opened with, “Who would win in a fight? Forrest Gump vs Tommy Pickles” Weird. I was into it. We had some banter back and forth until he asked me out for coffee. Also weird. How was I going to make it through a first date without drinking?

I made it there first and saw a hottie to my right. Was not my date upon further review. I took a seat facing the door. I was ready for a great ass date. He walked in. I looked up. I immediately wanted to leave.

He wore a beanie, had a scraggly beard, and gave the general vibe that he had not showered for a few days. Shit. And no alcohol on this date? We’re fucked.

We started talking and it was clear we would not go out again. He only asked me one question the entire time we were out. “What do you do for work?” He then told me all about his two jobs, the commute, living in NJ, how he never sleeps, why he never sleeps, what music he’s into, where his friends live, his siblings, and all the indie concerts he had been to.

After an hour or so, he said he had to go which I was more than fine with. I had to make the turn to get to the train so we hugged, went our separate ways, and I unmatched him as soon as I got on the train.

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