Encounter #73.4: Home Team

App: Tinder

Name: Owen*

Date Location: Yankee Lanes & Murphy’s Taproom – Manchester, NH

Location Review:  4.0 Stars – Are you taking your life into your hands going here? Maybe. But $20 all you can bowl after 9:30pm is a solid deal.

3.5 Stars – I’ve been a few times over the years and it’s fine. The deck is really nice though.

Date Duration: 19 hours

What Happened:

This was going to be THE night. We had made plans the day after I had a wedding and despite being hungover AF, I was going to hang out with Owen and we were going to have sex.

I checked in with him earlier that day gunning to be invited to his place and he suggested that we go bowling. *Sigh* Alright, I guess I can keep it in my pants for a few more hours. I met him at the bowling alley and things were going pretty well. Not only was I starting to catch up with him on the score board but, conversation was good. I also noticed that when we were sitting next to each other we were touching.

We had just started our third string when the fire alarm went off and everyone was evacuated. Was this God helping me get laid? I made the eyes at him in the parking lot and he asked if I wanted to get a drink somewhere. Fiiiiiiiine.

As expected, the conversation was great. We were connecting. We covered some of our baggage. (I even saw someone we went to high school with walk by). And we closed the bar down.

Owen walked me to my car and I was giving him the “fuck me” make out. He had me up against the car and I kept pulling him into me. Finally, I heard the long awaited words, “Do you want to get out of here?”. Don’t have to ask me twice.

His place was nice. Hood adjacent. But still, pretty nice. It didn’t take long for things to get going and because I don’t want ALL our shit out there, all I’ll say was it was good. Like, really fucking good. I had no complaints and he was very focused on making sure I enjoyed myself.

He was also so sweet. After we had sex we were all snuggled up making out and chit chatting. Pretty much the entire time he was petting my hair or rubbing my back which I loved. He also asked me if I had wanted him to kiss me on our first date. When I told him yes he let out a, “Damn it, I KNEW it but I just wasn’t thinking. God, that was so lame for me to ask for your number”. It was really cute. He also kept pulling me into him saying how he liked how weird I was, kissing my forehead, and that he liked spending time with me. Just very sweet.

We stayed up until 5/6am and when we woke up for real around 10 he offered to get bagels. My heart. It absolutely poured the rest of the day so we spent it inside playing games, making out, and having bomb ass sex. Really the whole thing just felt very comfortable.

Owen really surprised me. I kept expecting him to do something shitty like all the other men before but he seemed to be a genuinely kind person. It was after that weekend I decided to take a chance, turn off all the apps, and see what the fuck would happen.

Encounter #75.2: Landscaper

App: Tinder

Name: Ethan*

Date Location: La Festa Brick & Brew – Dover, NH

Location Review:  3.5 Stars – Cute spot, pizza was decent, lovely customer service.

Date Duration: 7 hours

What Happened:

Our first date was pretty damn good so I was anxious to meet up with Ethan again. Was I incredibly horny? Yes. Was that the majority of why I wanted to see him? Also yes.

We decided to keep it low key since he was a little wigged out by Delta variant so I parked at his place, we packed a cooler of drinks, grabbed pizza, and chilled in the park.

Like last time, conversation was easy. He was high energy and we could make each other laugh. He was also very sweet with physical affection. When we finished our pizza we decided to walk around a bit and he was holding my hand the whole time and would pull me in for a kiss at the right moments.

Eventually we made it to this wooded path and we pulled over to the side to sit on a random ass slab of granite. As you can expect, we made out. He asked if I’d go back with him (mostly so I could pee) and he held my hand the whole way home.

His apartment was nice. It was multiple floors and it looked like Ethan and his roommate genuinely tried to make it look nice.

Ethan threw something random on the tv and it didn’t take long for us to start making out. Now, this is where I think I was too aggressive. I was DTF in a way I hadn’t been in awhile so I got on top of him and just laid on the “fuck me” make out. He took forever to make his move. Eventually he asked if I wanted to take things upstairs.

When we got there, I’m pretty sure I terrified him because it was clear we just had different styles when it came to the bedroom. Not long into things he went to grab a condom and I made some comment like, “Ohhh we have plenty of other things we can do” and then made him touch me since it didn’t seem like he was going to take the time to work on me.

After some mediocre efforts on his part we finally had sex and it was meh. Really I did most of the work. I brushed it off as it was an initial encounter and he was nervous. But we had sex again shortly after and it was the same shit. NEXT.

We were both busy the week after and couldn’t hang out. Tbh I kinda just wanted him to ghost me or end it since I had a more promising player on the roster. Eventually he asked me out again and I had to break it off. What was weird though was that apparently he also kinda wanted to break it but didn’t want to hurt my feelings. I mean fine but YOU ASKED ME OUT SOOOOO. Pretty sure he was just trying to save face. Nonetheless, it helped make the decision that I was going to focus on one person and stop being a skank.