Month: May 2021

App: Bumble

Name: Asher*

Date Location: Stillwater – Boston, MA

Location Review:  4 Stars – All I have to say about that menu is wow. Absolutely delicious from start to finish. Just wish parking was slightly easier to find.

Date Duration: 2.5 hours

What Happened:

During lockdown, I would visit one of my good friends at her apartment in Boston. After the break up, I was a sad fuck and wasn’t ready to date. I was ready though to make fun of men’s shitty profiles.

Every time I visited we would fire up my accounts and she would swipe for me to see what on earth was out in the wild. One of her finds though wasn’t too bad and stuck beyond the weekend. Asher and I texted here and there and despite the fact that I left him on read for days at a time, he asked me out to dinner.

I wasn’t sure what to expect. The photos were pretty all over the place but on paper it seemed like he had his life together. He was in his early 30s, worked in finance, and owned a condo by The Garden in Boston. Not too shabby. He also went to University of Maryland so we had a lot to talk about when it came to ways to consume Old Bay.

He beat me to the restaurant and although I was happy he looked like his best pic, I wasn’t completely sold. I figured I had already driven down there, maybe there would be a spark or something.

Asher wined and dined the fuck out of me. Like wow. Drinks, apps, entree AND he brought up dessert. Tbh I can’t remember the last time a man had taken me out like that. For that, I give him credit.

Everything else though just didn’t work. Despite being in his 30s, he was still quite attached to the fraternity he was in in college. It wasn’t just “I keep in touch with my brothers” or, “Most of my friends came from the frat”. Every single story this man told was from 10+ years prior with these guys. Somehow everything under the sun could somehow tie back to this shit.

What was weird about Asher was that despite having some fun stories he was such a grump as a person and we were just polar opposites. He hated traveling and didn’t see the appeal of it. Never in my life have I met anyone who was fine with never seeing or experiencing anything different. Blew my god damn mind.

After a few hours I was very much over it and made some excuse to go. He paid for the whole thing, walked me to my car and even brushed the snow off which I appreciated. We went on our separate ways and never spoke again but, I was back out there. I mean I fucking hated it and went back on a break from dating but, I was treated like a fucking lady and it was kinda nice.