App: Tinder

Name: Ben*

Date Location: Amber Sushi

Location Review:  3.5 Stars – Nice ambient lighting, happy hour is okay, food is pretty flavorful.

Date Duration: 2 hours

What Happened:

One night when I was swiping away on Tinder, I came across Ben. He was that douchey kind of hot but he was from the Boston area so we immediately clicked. In just a few messages we went from chatting on Tinder to texting.

He asked to meet up over the weekend but I was traveling for the holiday. That’s when he asked if I was feeling spontaneous and would want to meet that night. I had nothing to lose. I asked if he was fine with meeting at the bar closest to my train and he said yes.

We had established that I’d let him know when I got on the train. I texted him when I found my seat. When I got above ground and had service, I noticed he didn’t text back. Weird? Oh, well. Maybe he was also underground and didn’t have service.

I texted him when I got to the bar and didn’t hear anything again. 5 minutes passed. 7. 10. 12. Asshole wasn’t coming. I texted him again saying, “Hey, so it looks like we missed each other. I’m going to head back home to NJ”.

Immediately he called me. Allegedly he was on his way in a cab, got stuck in traffic, and would be there in 10. I figured I was already there so I may as well wait 10 more minutes so I ordered a beer.

10 more minutes passed and he texted me that he was at a train station and he’d be there in 10. Wtf? This doesn’t make sense. If you were in a cab, why are you now at a train?

20 minutes later, this fucker shows up. He apologized and doubled down on the traffic excuse. We got to talking and it became more and more clear. This fucker was high on coke.

He was so hyped out and was clearly not in the same mental state as I was. Well, that’s a no from me. Then, he dropped the fucking n-word in conversation. NOPE. We’re done here.

I said I had to go home and he offered to walk me to the train. There wasn’t anywhere to walk me since it was 20 feet from my stop so we had the awkward hug. He went in for the kiss and I swerved hard so it nicked my cheek. He insisted that we do this again…I was good. Blocked. Unmatched.